OPINION

Make it A-La-Mode

Paul Richardson
Guest Columnist

I like pie. Obviously, you would say, that I like sweet things. You probably get that from my choice in the goodwife, or due to my physical composition your assumption is that I have a sweet tooth. Cake is ok, but I like pie. Take for example, at a recent fundraising auction I purchased a cake for fifty dollars and a pie for forty-five dollars. I paid for the cake but returned it to be re-auctioned to raise additional money. The pie I kept, and I kept it whole and intact until I arrived home.

Under similar circumstances several years ago, I purchased a cake that was baked by the goodwife for the exorbitant price of one hundred seventy-five dollars. If the goodwife prepared it, everyone knew that I would be obligated to win the auction, so I still believe that they drove the price up and played the market with some insider information. Very illegal. After winning the cake in the auction, I simply opened it, cut it into serving sized pieces and let everyone, that wanted a piece, eat it. Had that been a pie, it would have been a different story. I like pie.

About twenty-one years ago, I entered a little café along Route 71 somewhere between Mena and Cove Arkansas. It was, and maybe still is, a tiny little place sitting all alone on the east side of the highway. It is one of those places that you have to intentionally be going to in order to get there. This is not an impulse stop. Anyway, about twenty-one years ago I entered this café having only been in it once before a full year prior. The moment that I walked through the door the waitress announced with a shout, “I know you. You are the guy that ate an entire coconut meringue pie the last time you were here!” While this was true, you must understand that I was considerably younger, slimmer, healthier, and quite toned at the time. Don’t judge me.

There have been other pie incidents. One of my personal eccentricities is ordering pie and wanting it served with the meal. Let’s not delay the delivery of the pie. I along with some riding companions, was returning from Sedalia many years ago. It was in the evening, so we stopped at Cookie’s in Golden City for dinner. I ordered my meal, including the pie, and requested that the pie arrive first so that I could enjoy it along with the meal. Everyone in the party thought that was a magnificent idea and followed suit. The friend that was sitting immediately to my right ordered the same kind of pie as I had. When the pie was delivered to the table, some onery spirit took control of me and I picked up his piece of pie and licked the top of it, then placed it back on the table. There was quite a ruckus that followed.

I like pie, all sorts of pie, and if it is fruit pie, I like it a-la-mode. That is because I like ice cream!

Author’s Note: There are a lot more pie incidents that I will have to share. One includes retaliation for the pie licking story!